Raine

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Therapy went well today. It was the first time that someone other than Sierra went. Not only that but I told her that it was me, Raine. It was scary to say that, but afterwards it went fine. The sky didn’t fall, nothing terrible happened. She didn’t say “no your Christi”, or whatever else I was scared of.
We talked a lot about my remembered sick. About how that felt. Then we talked about, it not being time for me to merge(per Eaglewings) and how I felt about that. It was nice to talk about it with someone other than Nathan. With him I don’t know- It’s hard often. I wonder/worry a fair amount that I am saying too much to him, stressing him out, but this I didn’t worry about at all. I felt FREE to talk. It was a nice feeling, albeit a bit strange.
Windy and Ice. My sisters. I think why Eaglewings told me I still have work to do, is because of them. Maybe they have to merge with me? Carolyn pointed out that without Raine there can be no Ice. That wind is breath, helps Rain move. It really struck something inside of me.
I think of Ice as cold. Carolyn too said that Ice is only around at certain times. That conditions have to be just right. That feels so very true. It feels like there is something deeper in that for me to get.
Finally downloaded Journal5. Turns out we didn’t have to pay 50$ for it, we got a half price coupon because we had a previous version. It is nice so far, different yet the same.
Raine
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